Win

Today, I nailed a presentation at work. But I felt like shit.Because autoimmune disease,Because trauma attacks endlessly,Because my head ached so bad that the sound of my own voice felt like breaking glass in my brain,Because my feelings were shit and didn't matter,Because imposter syndrome,Because anxiety experiences the worst so it won't hurt so bad... Continue Reading →

Do You Feel It?

When you wake up, do you feel a balloon in your throat, too? Or maybe it's a corset: too small and too snug, cinched up tighter than poor Kate Winslet's mom did to her in 'Titanic.' "Hold still," I think she said before she yanked again. Or is it that feeling of having had too... Continue Reading →

Some Lists

I pick up my phone, turn on the battery-saving screen but then stop. What was I going to look up? I stare out the window for a moment---the window which opens to a yard covered in snow. A yard not meant for snow and yet, it wears it beautifully. A brand new, sparkling coat. A... Continue Reading →

F A L L

seasonal sunset before the year's long night— sleepy descent into creative darkness. seeds germinate beneath the cooling ground; there is [i think. i hope] healing in that stillness. i wish and pray for triumphant, awe-inspiring blooms when we all wake. i'll do my best to make something beautiful. i love you, jess

Mockingbirds

It’s morning, although I’m not sure the time. Dew still twinkles and slides on every surface and small critters---be them squirrels, rabbits, prairie dogs, or a mix of them all---shuffle and scuttle in the tall grass. High up in the pines, mockingbirds chack-chack-cheeeooo back and forth, back and forth.  Summer sticks around most of the... Continue Reading →

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